What Coaches and Mentors Can Learn from Made to Stick
Assuming that a technically accurate piece of feedback is enough for a mentee to remember and act on it is the specific trap Made to Stick names, and it's an easy one to fall into when you know every detail matters.
The whole book, compressed
This edition works through 4 core lessons — take them one at a time, not all at once.
What's different for your conditions
Tap whichever ones sound like you. Nothing here is sent or saved — it's just for your own noticing.
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The core lessons, applied to you
Find the single core point and strip everything else away
Feedback that tries to cover everything at once ends up remembered as nothing; identifying the one essential point and cutting everything that doesn't serve it makes it far more likely to stick with a mentee.
A mentor gives feedback covering many issues with equal weight, and the mentee walks away without a single clear idea of what to actually change.
Identify the one sentence you most want your mentee to remember from this session, and cut anything that doesn't support it.
Break the pattern people expect, to actually earn attention
Feedback delivered in the same format every session slides past without registering; feedback that genuinely surprises or challenges an assumption earns the attention needed to be remembered.
A mentor gives feedback in the same routine tone every time, and the mentee starts tuning it out as background noise.
Identify one assumption your mentee likely holds about their own work, and open your next piece of feedback by directly challenging it.
Make the idea concrete and give it built-in credibility
Abstract feedback is hard to remember or act on; grounding feedback in a concrete, specific example makes it stick on its own merits rather than relying purely on your authority.
A mentor tells a mentee to "communicate better" without a specific, concrete example of what that would look like, and the feedback slides past without leaving an impression.
Replace one piece of abstract feedback with a specific, concrete example your mentee could actually picture or apply.
Carry the idea with genuine emotion and a story, not a dry fact
Facts alone rarely change behavior; connecting feedback to real emotion and a concrete story makes it far more likely to actually stick and influence how a mentee acts.
Covering every issue and making one piece of feedback truly memorable aren't opposites — one memorable, actionable point often changes behavior more than a complete but forgettable list of feedback.
Name one thing, honestly
If your mentee had to describe the most important feedback you've given them, what would you want that to be?
Good. Now look back at the "Try this" line under whichever lesson feels most connected to what you just wrote, and treat that as this week's actual assignment — not all 4 at once.
The practices from this edition
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Run this for seven days
Replace one piece of abstract feedback with a specific, concrete example your mentee could actually picture or apply.