What Entrepreneurs Can Learn from The 5 Love Languages
Assuming that everyone feels appreciated the same way you do is the specific trap The 5 Love Languages names; people register care and appreciation in noticeably different ways, and showing appreciation in your own preferred style, rather than theirs, often misses entirely.
The whole book, compressed
This edition works through 4 core lessons — take them one at a time, not all at once.
What's different for your conditions
Tap whichever ones sound like you. Nothing here is sent or saved — it's just for your own noticing.
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The core lessons, applied to you
People register appreciation differently
People show and receive appreciation in noticeably different ways, and assuming a co-founder, employee, or partner experiences it the same way you do is a common, invisible source of them feeling undervalued despite your real effort.
A founder assumes public recognition is the best way to thank a key employee, while that employee would have felt far more valued by a quiet, specific comment or a practical adjustment to their workload.
Ask one person you work closely with directly what kind of recognition or appreciation actually feels meaningful to them, rather than assuming.
Identify what actually lands for the specific person
Identifying what actually makes a specific co-founder, employee, or partner feel valued, rather than guessing or projecting your own preference, is the necessary first step.
A founder keeps giving the same kind of appreciation (a bonus, a title, a public mention) to someone who would actually feel more valued by direct time and attention, and wonders why it doesn't seem to land.
Notice how the person you're trying to appreciate responds to different kinds of gestures over the next few weeks, and adjust based on what you observe.
Practice an unfamiliar way of showing appreciation
Deliberately practicing a way of showing appreciation that isn't your natural default usually matters more to the other person than doing more of what already comes easily to you.
A founder who naturally expresses care through solving problems for people keeps doing that, when what a specific colleague or partner actually needs is direct, spoken acknowledgment.
Identify one way of showing appreciation that doesn't come naturally to you, and practice it deliberately with one person this week.
Show up consistently, not just through grand gestures
Consistency over time, expressed regularly rather than only through occasional grand gestures, is what actually keeps a working relationship or a partnership feeling secure and valued.
Building the business and maintaining your key relationships aren't opposites — a small, well-placed gesture usually costs less time than the relationship strain that comes from skipping it entirely.
Name one thing, honestly
Is there someone important to your business or personal life who you've been appreciating in your own preferred style rather than theirs?
Good. Now look back at the "Try this" line under whichever lesson feels most connected to what you just wrote, and treat that as this week's actual assignment — not all 4 at once.
The practices from this edition
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Run this for seven days
Identify one way of showing appreciation that doesn't come naturally to you, and practice it deliberately with one person this week.